Advertisement
Film

Jack Nicholson can stand on his balcony if he wants. You don’t need to see it

Jack Nicholson is trending this morning after he was “caught” standing on his own balcony. The best thing we can do is ignore it.

Hollywood icon (and owner of the cheekiest smile in the world) Jack Nicholson is trending this morning, after a bizarre and frankly disgraceful “exclusive” in the MailOnline. Because, as the world burns and we struggle through a horrific cost-of-living crisis, it is apparently news that an 85-year-old, retired man went out for some air on his own balcony.

The story – a cynical write-around for a handful of stalker-level paparazzi shots and a grainy video – is wrapped up in classic tabloid faux-concern for Nicholson’s “welfare”, saying he looks “dishevelled”. I’m going to go ahead and say I’m glad they don’t have a camera on me first thing in the morning. The concern of “unnamed friends” is the last refuge of a clickbaiter. With friends like these, etc…

To be fair, the same publication also wrote a story yesterday blaming the “rise of women” for the “DOWNFALL of Tupperware” [capitalisation theirs], which is obviously demented.

Let me save you the bother of clicking. Other than “man wears t-shirt on own property” the article’s main earth-shattering detail is “you could hear birds”. It is not in line for a Pulitzer.

Twitter has been enraged on Nicholson’s behalf, which is quite right. This is a man who has entertained us for decades, both with some of the greatest performances ever captured on film and one of the last great, bona fide movie stars. He’s earned a bloody rest. He owes you nothing.

Sadly, outrage only spreads the virus further. The Mail cares not whether you’re slagging them off when you retweet the link, as long as you get it in front of more people. Hate clicks count the same, people. So if you want to show your distaste, your best option is to ignore them. Emphasise what it you love instead of what you hate.

Advertisement
Advertisement

With Jack Nicholson this is not hard. So, instead of joining the stalkers to watch a video no one really ever wanted (except perhaps the pap who’s been paid handsomely for being a creep), in which the highlight is “man frowns at idiots”, may I suggest you crack out One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest, The Shining, Batman, Chinatown, The Departed, Mars Attacks!, About Schmidt, Easy Rider, Terms of Endearment or A Few Good Men? You know, any of the movies Nicholson deliberately made.

Advertisement

Change a vendor's life this Christmas

This Christmas, 3.8 million people across the UK will be facing extreme poverty. Thousands of those struggling will turn to selling the Big Issue as a vital source of income - they need your support to earn and lift themselves out of poverty.

Recommended for you

Read All
Seven Samurai is the daddy of all action films. So why have I never watched it until now?
Film

Seven Samurai is the daddy of all action films. So why have I never watched it until now?

John David Washington and Danielle Deadwyler: 'When are Black people not in dire straits?'
Danielle Deadwyler as Berniece and John David Washington as Boy Willie in The Piano Lesson
Film

John David Washington and Danielle Deadwyler: 'When are Black people not in dire straits?'

Emily Mortimer: 'Britain can be a tolerant place – but obviously there's times when it isn't'
Film

Emily Mortimer: 'Britain can be a tolerant place – but obviously there's times when it isn't'

Ben Whishaw on the 'quiet political message' running through Paddington: 'I love it'
Film

Ben Whishaw on the 'quiet political message' running through Paddington: 'I love it'

Most Popular

Read All
Renters pay their landlords' buy-to-let mortgages, so they should get a share of the profits
Renters: A mortgage lender's window advertising buy-to-let products
1.

Renters pay their landlords' buy-to-let mortgages, so they should get a share of the profits

Exclusive: Disabled people are 'set up to fail' by the DWP in target-driven disability benefits system, whistleblowers reveal
Pound coins on a piece of paper with disability living allowancve
2.

Exclusive: Disabled people are 'set up to fail' by the DWP in target-driven disability benefits system, whistleblowers reveal

Cost of living payment 2024: Where to get help now the scheme is over
next dwp cost of living payment 2023
3.

Cost of living payment 2024: Where to get help now the scheme is over

Citroën Ami: the tiny electric vehicle driving change with The Big Issue
4.

Citroën Ami: the tiny electric vehicle driving change with The Big Issue