At 16 my passions were girls, a half-hearted attempt to learn karate and an equally half-hearted interest in punk rock. I liked The Stranglers very much. I went to one of their concerts in Southampton when I was 15 or 16, but I wasn’t a fully fledged punk. My mum sewed my jeans über-tight and I had a scraggy haircut that wasn’t a mohican, it was a weird mess of a crop. I didn’t know what I was doing. I straddled somewhere between The Stranglers and David Bowie. I was a bit of an outsider. Like many adolescents, I was slightly unformed and eager to find out where the next party was, when the next disco was and who I fancied.
Out of all of the hormonal tempests of adolescence, the art room gave me a kind of focus and clarity. I had shown myself to be inept at sports, so I put my energy into art. I went to a grammar school in Salisbury and had a very good art teacher, Duncan Davies, who gave me a lot of support.
So I thought I would go to art school and attempt to be a painter, that is where my strengths were in terms of schooling. To a degree that led me to here. I went to do a foundation course at Chelsea Art School when I was 18 and things happened on that course that took me towards deciding to be an actor. I realise now I have been behind the camera on three films [including the newly released Rudolf Nureyev biopic The White Crow] that I have got back in touch with my visual sensibility, making choices about camera and composition and lighting. It is very exciting to re-engage with my visual awareness.
I could have worked harder, I could have applied myself harder, and I don’t just mean in relation to exam success.
If I could direct my younger self, I would try to encourage that person away from an excuse not to work or an excuse to just go out all the time. Don’t waste your time! Life goes by quickly, so any time spent hanging out or idling your time away – which is a natural thing – just be aware that is valuable time when you could be doing something, making something or thinking forward about stuff. I could have worked harder, I could have applied myself harder, and I don’t just mean in relation to exam success. I mean just embrace things. Embrace life. In adolescence, any excuse to sit in front of the telly or amble about half-heartedly smoking somebody else’s cigarettes hoping that girl you fancy will look at you – so much time is wasted like that.
My mum would play recordings of Laurence Olivier doing speeches from Hamlet and Henry V when I was very young. So he was always this mysterious voice, this incredible, expressive, elastic tenor voice and very quickly became a symbol of a great actor. Later, as I was more conscious of wanting to be an actor I became more alert to the performances of Charles Laughton in The Hunchback of Notre Dame, Trevor Howard in The Third Man and became more aware of American film acting – Brando, Robert Duvall, those naturalistic actors that challenged the old school.