Dermot O’Leary: ‘I was bricking it when I started The X Factor’

Dermot O’Leary was born Seán Dermot O’Leary in 1973 in Colchester, Essex to Irish parents from County Wexford. After leaving school with just two GCSE’s, he retook his school qualifications at a local college and eventually ended up doing a media studies degree at Middlesex University.

After a stint as a DJ on BBC Essex, he became a runner for various production companies, and from there managed to get a presenting slot on Channel 4 as part of their T4 strand. Since then, he’s become a British TV mainstay, appearing on Big Brother’s Little Brother, Blankety Blank, Shattered and from 2007 to 2015 The X Factor. He also co-presented the Brit Awards in 2017 with Emma Willis. Since 2020 he has co-hosted This Morning with Alison Hammond.

In his Letter to My Younger Self, Dermot O’Leary looks back at a life in TV, which started unexpectedly but has flourished to the extent that he is now one of the UK’s most familiar faces on the box.

I went to a lovely school. It was a local state Catholic school, so I went to school with a lot of Irish and a lot of Catholics of different nationalities. So it was a bit of a melting pot for quite a little colloquial town in Colchester. It wasn’t religious with a massive R, but religion was a part of it. I wasn’t particularly very good academically, and I was very easily distracted, so I left school. And then me and my dad had a chat. My dad is a very wise soul, and he said, we need to think about what you want to do. So I retook my GCSEs at the local sixth form and something clicked and I started doing well. I did my A-levels and went to university to follow my love for politics and history. 

I did my work experience at a restaurant and fell in love with the hospitality industry. So I was a kitchen porter, then I was a waiter, and I carried on doing that job all the way through university. I loved it. I would have happily gone into that industry.

I was always the indie kid, but I was never defined by a tribe. I always hated the idea that I could sit next to someone in class, but then I wouldn’t be able to speak to them outside class if we were into different sorts of music. The Pogues were the first band I ever saw live when I was 16, maybe a tiny bit older. The first band I saw without my mum and dad. It was in Brixton, and that was with Shane MacGowan. And then the next year I went back to see them. But by that time, the band had had to boot Shane out because of his alcoholism and I remember being so disappointed because Joe [Strummer, in 1991] was vocalist. And everyone was going, ‘Aw, man, Shane’s not doing it.’ And now you look back and go, what?! The lead singer of The Clash?! So, definitely music was a big thing for me, and movies and sport. I just loved playing sport. I didn’t have much time for relationships, because I was kind of busy. I had loads of mates that were girls, but it just all seemed quite complicated. So I just played rugby and American football.

I wasn’t the cool kid at school. I was kind of a joker. I wasn’t in the top set, or anything. I’d have been mortified if I was in trouble, I wouldn’t want to piss anyone off. I’m still like that now, I hate when people think ill of me, or I’m being misinterpreted in some way, I can’t bear it. I couldn’t get enough of meeting new people and experiencing new things. And I think that’s stood me in pretty good stead, to be honest with you

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Being Irish is completely elemental to who I am and what I am. I grew up in Colchester, which, as you probably know, is not an Irish town. But there was a very small, quite active Irish diaspora at the time. It was based around going to mass and then going to a hotel for lunch – the guy who ran it was Irish and also went to mass with us. So that small community became very cherished. And though I was brought up in a very nice, safe English village, when we shut our door it felt different. There was a picture of Our Lady, there were crucifixes, there was a lot of Irish iconography. And that was very formative for me, the stories my parents told and the songs my parents sang. And I went back to Ireland every summer. I feel lucky enough to call three places home, London, Ireland and Colchester. 

I don’t think I was that driven. Well, not at that age, because how could I really do what I wanted? It’s quite hard to be tangibly ambitious when something feels so out of reach. It’s kind of hard to think, it’s definitely going to happen, and god forbid, I wasn’t manifesting anything. I wanted to be an actor when I was about 15. And then, halfway through my GCSEs, that little voice in my head popped up, saying maybe you’re not good enough. But I loved being on stage. I could have been an OK actor, but I wasn’t great and I just didn’t want to do anything half-arsed. But I hosted a live concert when I was in the fifth year. And I’ll never forget being on stage and getting a laugh or getting a reaction. I was like, oh wow, I’ve got to get more of this. I need this. But working in TV felt so otherworldly. Where on earth would I get the opportunity for it to happen? 

After I finished university, I saved up some money and went around America. Then I started sending my CV to lots of production companies. And I didn’t hear from a lot of them. Some of them said, we’ll keep you on file. Some of them said no. But one documentary company gave me an interview, and I got a job as a runner. I just worked my arse off. I slept on a couch for the first couple of months. I did everything to make myself indispensable, and I loved it. I was loaned out to different productions, so I just got this unbelievable wealth of experience very quickly. And then after about six months, once they’re sure you’re not a liability, they ask, what you want to do? And I said, well, this feels a bit silly, but I want
to be on television. 

I have to be honest, I was absolutely bricking it when I started The X Factor. I was working on Big Brother’s Little Brother, I don’t know if that’s what got me The X Factor. It was very nerve racking, thinking about whether to do it, because everything up to then had been very collaborative. I’d been a big cog in a machine, whereas now I was in the big league. But of course, I had to take it. I mean, it’s like getting a transfer to Arsenal, you know, you can’t not do it. And Simon [Cowell], to be fair to him, from the day I started to the day I finished, he said, “I’m never going to tell you to say anything. I’m never going to tell you not to give me a hard time.” And he was true to his word. I was always given free rein to do whatever I liked on that show, with 20 million people watching. 

Press attention? I kind of ignored it, if I’m honest. I never really went to places where I was going to meet people just hanging out for the sake of hanging out. That never really appealed to me, I’d rather go to the pub with my friends. And me and Dee [Koppang, his wife] got together before The X Factor started. So there was never really an interest in my love life either, because I was settled with someone who I loved. There was never much chance of a scandal. 

I think my younger self would be very surprised at the success I’ve had. I think the work ethic has always been there. And I put success down to three things: it’s luck, talent and hard work. And everything has to happen in equal thirds. I’m so lucky that the envelope fell on the right desk at the right time. I’m so lucky that that first producer took a punt on me and gave me a chance. I’m so lucky that Simon decided to offer me the job on The X Factor. All of those things. 

If I could live one moment again I would relive me intercepting a try against the Colchester Royal Grammar School and taking it all  the way back. I passed to my friend Patrick Lucas, who subsequently scored. I passed because I thought it was the right thing to do but it wasn’t the right thing to do. What I should have done was take that ball myself and score. Why did I pass to Patrick? It could have been the greatest sporting moment of my life. 

The one thing I always take solace in is that everyone I love knows I love them. Everyone that loves me, I know they love me. I don’t feel like I’m robbed of anything. I still have my mum and dad, but when I don’t have them any more, I’ll know that they loved me, and I love them, and I just thank them for everything. Nothing’s been left unsaid. And that feels like a position of rare and unique privilege, and I’m very humbled by it.

NFL: Big Game Night with Dermot O’Leary is on Sundays from 5.30pm on Channel 5.

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