Family evicted from temporary housing after having grandparents over for a brew: ‘It blew my mind’

“It was an abnormal, unhealthy way of living, and I wasn’t willing to subject my children to it.” Hayley Blanks remains defiant about her decision to break the rules at her temporary accommodation, even though it ultimately led to the family’s eviction. 

She argues that a blanket visitor ban placed on her family by her temporary accommodation provider – which barred any relatives and friends from visiting her children at the flat in Bexhill-on-Sea – was cruel and would harm their wellbeing. 

And facing the prospect of up to three years stuck in temporary housing, Hayley decided it was a risk worth taking. 

“If it was genuinely temporary, as in six months to a year, I could understand and I would reluctantly go along with it,” she told Big Issue. “But they were talking about years of living like this. That’s my 14-year-old daughter’s childhood gone.” 

A recent report from University College London (UCL) found that a ban on visitors to households in temporary accommodation can cause children to become isolated from their peers and affect their development. Although homelessness charity Shelter has no data on the number of children affected by blanket visitor bans, with a record 151,630 children currently living in temporary accommodation with their families in England, potentially many thousands could be affected. 

According to Shelter, there is currently no legislation or guidance on the use of visitor bans in temporary accommodation in England. They are determined by local authorities and some, like Islington Council, allow people staying in temporary accommodation to have visitors during the day, but not overnight. In Scotland the devolved government’s guidance on homelessness states accommodation should ‘have provision to allow visitors, including provision for visits from children’.

“Being in temporary accommodation is already distressing and traumatic for children and young people,” said Dr Michele McDowell, an independent educational and child psychologist. “This impact is likely to be exacerbated if they are not able to see family and friends, having an adverse effect on their mental health possibly leading to anxiety, low mood, depression and low self-concept.  

“This can also impact on their emotional availability for learning and developing a range of essential skills which can have a lasting effect on their lives long after childhood.” 

Hayley, partner Barry and their two children, aged eight and 14, spent many years living happily in privately rented accommodation on the Sussex coast. But in late 2022 the family faced a double blow when Barry was forced to sign off work as a manager of care at a children’s residential home due to a progressive back injury, and their landlord hiked their rent by £500 per month, giving them just eight weeks’ notice. Unable to afford anywhere else, the family were eventually evicted and placed into temporary accommodation in January 2024. 

Hayley says that it wasn’t until after the family moved in that they were told about the accommodation restrictions, including the strict no-visitor rule. 

“That just absolutely blew my mind,” said Hayley. “We were stuck in a top-floor two-bed flat with a 14-year-old girl and an eight-year-old boy and not allowed anybody to see them. It was just beyond me.  

“We have been back and forth to so many different people about it and we were always given the same reasons, because in temporary accommodation there can be unsavoury and undesirable characters roaming the place – their words, not mine. 

“That’s not us. We’re a normal family with two children who would have nanny and granddad round for a cup of tea. Occasionally, my children might have a friend round.” 

Hayley’s son suffers from severe asthma, which left him hospitalised three times in 2023. He also has severe allergies to grass, dust and animals, which makes it very difficult for him to visit friends. 

“Every single person I know has dogs and cats,” explained Hayley. “When he’s around them, his eyes close up, he can’t see, he can’t breathe.  

“I said all of this to them, but nobody cares.” 

After her complaints were not resolved, Hayley decided to take a risk in a bid to give her children a normal childhood, inviting her parents over for a cup of tea and the children’s friends’ round. 

“My daughter’s 14, so she obviously spends her time in her room doing face masks and nails and all that sort of stuff. My son would just have someone round for pizza and Switch,” she said. 

Things came to a head on 25 June when Hayley’s daughter and her friend tried to enter the building after school to pick up a beach bag, use the toilet, and have a glass of water – but found their way blocked by the property manager. 

“I got a phone call from my daughter saying she wouldn’t let them in the building. And I just exploded,” recalls Hayley. “I ran down the stairs and asked why she was physically intimidating two 14-year-olds. There was an argument and she just kept saying the same thing, that she’s not allowed in. I said she is coming in as they need to get a bag and use the toilet and I’m not leaving two 14-year-olds hanging around on the street.” 

At 6pm the family was served with an eviction notice from, ordering them to be out property by 11am the following day. 

As they could not find a removal firm at such short notice, Barry was forced to help move the family’s possessions to storage, despite being in excruciating pain with his bad back. 

The family was moved to emergency accommodation in neighbouring Eastbourne, meaning the children had to travel an extra hour each day to go to school and Hayley to work as a carer. 

Speaking about the accommodation, Hayley said: “It’s awful, it’s disgusting. It’s got mould and damp all over the walls, it’s just vile. 

“If we are there long-term, it would definitely impact my son’s health.” 

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Hayley is working with the Brighton Housing Trust to appeal the decision to evict them and is seeking a judicial review of Rother District Council’s policy on families living in temporary accommodation. But for the Blanks family, the damage has been done. 

“My daughter has become very anxious, very worried and more withdrawn than usual,” Hayley said. “She also doesn’t like seeing us sad, that upsets her. My husband and I have conversations, and we’ll get upset or end up in a row and that’s horrible for her. 

“My son’s behavior has actually become appalling. He’s just been off the walls with his behavior at home and I think it’s his way of reacting out of frustration with everything.” 

Dr McDowell says this decline in behaviour could be attributed to a lack of social interaction. 

She said: “Children often learn how to regulate their emotions by watching and observing how family members and friends manage their emotions and interact in different situations and scenarios. If children are not given this opportunity it can impact on when and if they develop these skills. Difficulties regulating emotions can lead to tantrums, frustration and difficulties with expressing emotions effectively. 

“Meanwhile prolonged separation from family and friends, particularly if there is no indication of for how long, may cause anxiety and stress for children leading to changes in behaviour and wellbeing including stress-related behaviours.” 

Hayley added: “We consider ourselves good parents, and I feel I’ve done everything within my power to not let it affect the children. 

“But of course it has had an impact, and that’s hard for me to admit as a parent.” 

A Rother District Council spokesperson said: “The council uses a number of temporary accommodation providers and only a small number of these properties available are for the district council’s exclusive use.  

“For accommodation with communal areas and shared facilities, property owners often have a ‘no visitor’ rule in place for the safety and security of all residents. Residents will be asked to sign an agreement when moving into this type of property and the rules will be displayed clearly in the building.  

“At the point the accommodation is offered the council also write to the customer to advise them of the general rules in temporary accommodation, including the policy around no visitors being permitted. Any breaches of the accommodation rules will result in a warning notice in the first instance before any further action is taken, unless it is a serious offence, which on this occasion it was not. The council is making a continued effort to purchase temporary accommodation to reduce the use of temporary accommodation provided by private landlords.” 

In June, a report from the campaign group Generation Rent named Rother as one of the local councils spending the biggest proportion of its budget on temporary accommodation. 

The average stay in temporary accommodation in Rother in the last quarter was 23 weeks, but families face a longer wait due to the lack of available housing in the district. 

The RDC spokesperson added that only 13 three or four-bedroom properties were let via the social housing waiting list during the whole of 2023. 

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