Ukrainian mum who fled war dreams of buying Christmas tree and presents for her children

Natalia fled Ukraine with her 10-year-old son soon after war broke out. They came to the UK and had no friends or family here. They left behind their family home with its small garden, and their dog and cat. Natalia’s husband had volunteered to fight in the war and she missed him desperately.

“I felt very stressed,” she recalls. “Sometimes I could not speak with him for two weeks because he moved into dangerous territory. I was very worried about my son. When I woke up every morning, I was crying, and my son was crying every evening. It was a very hard time because I was afraid I would never see my husband again.”

Natalia dreamt of returning to the home which had been given to her by her grandmother. “I felt empty inside me,” she says.

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Her son started school and the first months were difficult for him. He did not speak English, but slowly, he started to understand and make friends at school. He remained homesick throughout.

“My son felt my stress and he was also worried. One day he said to me: ‘Mama, you look like a small dog and I would like to carry you.’ I understand he meant I looked very bad, and my son had seen this and he was worried. I tried to tell myself to be strong,” Natalia adds.

Last Christmas, which is just days before his birthday, all Natalia’s son wanted was a cat – but their emergency accommodation does not allow pets – and for his father to come to London to be with him.

“That was a big dream,” Natalia says. And it happened. Just before Christmas, her husband came to live with them, seeking safety after experiencing horrors as a soldier.

This winter comes with different worries. It’s cold, and they need to pay their bills and buy clothes for their children. They have a new baby, who was born in September this year.

“My son, the oldest, he’s growing up very fast. Every season he needs shoes, because every three months he’s growing bigger,” Natalia says. 

When she was pregnant, they were fearful – they had nothing for the baby and were struggling to afford their essentials. She had found a job as a teaching assistant, but her small salary is not enough for their whole family.

Her midwife was from Belarus and understood Ukrainian, and she helped their family. They were referred to charity Little Village, which runs a network of baby banks in London.

“A woman called me from Little Village, and she asked what I needed. Two or three days later, I got a package from Little Village, with clothes, toys and books. And I remember I was very, very happy. It was a big gift for us, big helpful, big kindness,” Natalia says.

Natalia hopes to be able to buy a Christmas tree this year, to relive happy memories of hiding gifts under the tree in Ukraine. She has an older daughter too, who is now an adult and living in Poland.

“I would like to buy the Christmas tree, because in Ukraine, the whole time we had a Christmas tree, and we’d hide some gifts for children under the Christmas tree,” Natalia says.

It is only with the support of the public that baby banks like those run by Little Village can help families like Natalia’s, and it is set to launch a Christmas appeal so it can “reach more families with essential things they need – as well as a little festive cheer”.

Sophie Livingstone, chief executive for Little Village, said: “We hear from parents every day who are struggling to provide even the basics for their children, let alone gifts or festive treats. 

“The joy at this time of year should be something all children experience, and we’re determined to make this season brighter for as many families as we can, but we need the public’s help to make it happen.

“The parents we see every day are struggling to afford essentials like warm clothing and bedding, let alone toys. Another future has to be possible.”

Natalia dreams of returning to their home in Ukraine, but for now her family is making the most of her life here. She has started a yoga training course and would like to set up her own studio one day, and her husband is learning English in the hopes that he too can find work.

Life is still difficult and they miss their family in Ukraine, but Natalia is thankful for the kindness she has been shown.

“I’m very grateful to Little Village,” she says. “This is an amazing kindness for people who came here, like me. It is like a family. I am very grateful. It is very important. I would like to say a big thank you from all of my family.”

Find out how to donate to Little Village for its Big Give Week here.

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